Losing a Loved One While You’re Battling with Depression

cemetary

Photo: phj2012 on Flickr

So this happened. I am currently having the worse time of my life, fighting against a severe depression since 5 months – although it feels like it has been forever. And earlier this week, my beloved grandmother passed away.

I have feared this day since I was a kid. I didn’t want to believe that my grandparents would someday disappear before me. We were very close.

But now, I haven’t cried a single tear. I don’t understand what’s happening. Am I still not realizing it? Or am I too immersed in my own little misery to actually care? This terrible thought scares me so much. I know I’m not the same person I used to be before my depression. But how can I possibly have no reaction? I feel guilty and confused.

Any thoughts?

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