Strange Japanese Beauty Products You Never Knew You Needed

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As a Western woman living in Japan, it’s hard not to wonder about Japanese women’s beauty secrets. How can they look so perfectly groomed all the time ? While the answer may disappointingly be only many hours spent on beauty care and lucky genes, it’s a fact that Japanese women spend a lot of money on beauty products and services. However, the efficiency of many of these remains to be proved…

I recently received a catalogue with so many strange beauty products, I had to make a post about it. The catalogue is from Peach John, a Japanese lingerie brand. They also sell pajamas and room wear, casual clothing, house accessories and beauty products. It was my first time getting an Peach John Beauty catalogue, and I was totally amazed at what I found inside.

I can’t speak for the whole country, since I live in Tokyo, but I can say that I’m totally freezing since November, and will probably do until March. Japanese winters are not so cold (I’m Canadian), but houses are not insulated, and there is no central heating. Even at school, classrooms are heated, but good luck when you want to go to the bathroom. Basically, you never feel totally warm, even if you sit in front of your portable heater, because in that case your feet will burn and the rest of your body will still be cold.

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This girl certainly doesn’t live in Japan.

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Therefore, there’s a huge market for various types of “body warmers” meant to be worn inside: long socks, arm warmers, belly warmers, etc. There are also some pretty weird ones, such as the face / neck warmer here :

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Why wear a simple sock ? How about a leg warmer that covers your heel, and a mini-sock for the rest of your feet ?

Is “Have a Moist Dream” a way to say that these are so warm that you’ll actually sweat ? So many questions.

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What about these tiny and cold… blankets ? Sleeping bags ? They look so cold and not useful…

Did I mention this girl doesn’t live in Japan ? She would probably get hypothermia by now.

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The next item is fabulous. What to do when only some parts of your fingers are cold, but not the whole hand ? Here’s the answer.

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Here is the “I’m okay for a date anytime” series. With these discreet accessories, you can remove your unsightly facial hair anytime, anywhere.

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Fun point here is the little cartoon. On the left side, the girl is so happy that she brought her electric shaver as her date ended in a hotel room. She can do her business in the bathroom while her guy waits… or not ? See the horrified boyfriend below ? He’s actually hearing the sound of the shaver and he thinks that his girl is using an adult toy so he’s totally shocked. THIS COULD HAPPEN TO YOU !

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Here the cartoon shows us that you’re not a real lady if you don’t care about your feet. Make sure to remove these ugly feet with the Bubble Foot Remover.

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Let’s move on to the weirdest items of the catalogue :

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The product on the left is a “beauty steam cleansing towel”. I’m not too sure about what it does, but apparently you can use a chainsaw when you put it on.

The torture device on the right claims to make your nose higher. As the pictured girl says : if it’s for beauty… (I’ll do it !)

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I bet you never knew you needed beauty masks for your breasts.

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See the difference ? See how better your hand looks when holding a tube of Peach John hand primer ?

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These half slippers are supposedly good for your body. Let me doubt it.

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At first I thought it was another example of a specific body parts warmer, but no, it’s apparently to help the posture. Ok, then.

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If you wear this while sleeping, you will wake up with a nice ass. Or not.

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Last but not least, these items “for nippless” (sic). Nipple patches will leave your nipples all soft and pretty, while Virgin Peach will make then pink in only 5 minutes !

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If I was rich, I would certainly order some of these products and test them just for fun… but most of them are actually quite expensive !

More Peach John wonder here.

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